December is a spiritual month for many of us. Some of us have Chanukah, others have Christmas. This is the season of giving. As we move closer to these holidays, and approach the year 2001, let us all continue to be thankful for the tolerance, understanding, and support that most of us enjoy in our lives. Let us remember and embrace those who don't have this kind of support. Let us open our hearts to those whose hearts are hurting

I would like to call everyone's attention to a wonderful feature article that appeared recently in the Los Angeles Times. Through the Gender Labyrinth details the life of Lynn Conway, an M2F who played a very significant role in the development of modern computers. Conway's pain and struggle make what many of us experience seem like a cake walk in comparison. I'm grateful to Ms. Conway for all of her sacrifices to help our community. Read the article at http://www.latimes.com/print/magazine/20001119/t000111062.html

Hopefully, by next month's edition, we'll be able to offer some kind of report.

Join Us!

This month's meeting will be on Thursday, December 7th at our normal location, using our regular format. If you are inspired to cook up an entrée for this month's meeting, please indulge yourself.

Items to bring:

Casseroles/Main Dishes
Side Dishes
Hors d’oeuvres
Snacks
Soda (pop)
And
Desserts

Need directions?

Call (216) 691-HELP (4357) or
e-mail Karen at karen_gross@transfamily.org.

Volunteers are needed not only to take charge of committees but to serve on those committees as well. We need people to commit to take leadership roles in the organization and to actively serve. We really need your skills and commitment of time. If you have benefited from TransFamily, then please consider giving back. We also need people to help cleaning up after the meetings. Please, help us out.

Call or email Karen and find out what you can do to help TransFamily continue.

The Four Therapists

By Diane Frank

In collecting information about mental health professionals who can provide assistance to people with gender and sexuality issues, it occurred to me that some discussion of what exactly that assistance can be would also be helpful.

First of all, this profession can help sort out whether difficulties we face are neurochemical problems or not. Depression, anxiety, obsessive-compulsive behavior, and other mental disorders may be caused by variations in brain or body chemistry that can be modified by appropriate, monitored use of psychoactive drugs.

Other difficulties may be due to how we perceive life. Our outlook as influenced by our upbringing and experience will give us one view, but it is not always the only perspective. Another person's viewpoint can be invaluable. Friends are often our first choice for this kind help, but professionals generally have a broader range of experience, training and understanding to offer when problems get serious.

We may engage in habitual behavior that we desire to change. In some cases, working with a mental health professional, or participation in one of a plethora of 12-step programs can facilitate the desired change in behavior. In other cases, it is not the behavior that needs changing so much as our own perception of the behavior.

Finally, looking forward, as we deal with our own issues, we must also deal with the impact on society, the workplace and the people near and dear to us. Guidance and perspective on how to achieve a satisfactory outcome and planning one's approach can be very important.

There's a joke with a kernel of truth:

Q: How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Just one, but the light bulb really has to want to change.

Seeking help from a mental health professional is pointless if one is not willing to put in the hard work and be open to change. Help may not come cheaply, and the time a professional has is not infinite. If you are not committed to the work, then you can inadvertently be depriving some one else of needed time and wasting your own money.

On Thursday, October 5th, 2000 four therapists made brief comments and answered questions about their practices at the monthly Trans-Family meeting. The therapists were Antone Feo Ph.D., his associate Diane Mueller LPCC, Brooke Kroto, LISW and Merâl Crane, M.A., LPCC. While the group was primarily focused on the needs of trans-sexuals, there was a substantial amount of discussion about cross-dressing issues.

One question that came up immediately was why was it so hard to find therapists. Merâl Crane pointed out that she had rough sailing in the early years of her practice and has been selective about where and how she publicizes it since. The lay public expects that gender issues are a curable disease, and tends to focus anger and blame on therapists who don't endorse that uninformed position.

Several questions pursued the area of the person who isn't certain what they are dealing with and what tools therapists might use helping these people. Ms. Kroto explained that part of the job was to facilitate the process of self discovery, to help people tease apart the issues and explore possibilities. Dr. Feo remarked that a key function is to help the client deal with inappropriate shame and guilt. While there are some formal guidelines for classification, Merâl Crane felt that these tools had the potential for misuse and preferred to discuss them only in the context of a therapist-client relationship.

Dr. Feo made an interesting response to a question that proposed that unlike transsexuality, cross dressing itself was an obsessive-compulsive disorder. Dr. Feo asserted that crossdresser's desire to cross dress is unaffected by treatment with Luvox™ , a medication known to help control obsessive compulsive behavior. Connected to this discussion was the assertion, apparently agreed to by all the therapists, that there was no means of dealing with the desire to cross dress except dressing, no matter how much the person wished to eliminate the behavior.

Diane Mueller has 20 years of experience in community mental health and has been working very happily for the past year with Dr. Feo. She enjoys couples work, adolescents and families in addition to gender issues. One of her present activities is facilitating a MtF therapy group. In choosing a therapist she recommend checking for experience and background and making sure that one feels comfortable with the person and the flow of communication.

Dr. Feo's 12 years of experience started cold helping a transvestite in the context of other psychological problems. His practice has grown in this area since, including forensic psychology and human sexuality. He added to Ms. Mueller's remarks that you shouldn't have to be responsible for teaching your therapist. You can find further information on Dr. Feo's practice at his web site:

Brooke Kroto, a licensed clinical social worker, light heartedly describes herself as a female-to-female because her contact with the gender community has led to a reawakening and renewed sense of valuing her own femininity. Ms. Kroto's training is primarily in the area of trauma and dealing with the adult consequences of childhood trauma. With only four years experience, she considers herself a novice in the gender field, adding that the gender population is not about disorder and pathology. Since everyone starts with no experience, Ms. Kroto remarked that the sense of connection one makes with a counselor and philosophical alignment can be crucial to a good outcome. She practices out of offices in Rock River and Richmond Heights.

Merâl Crane believes that her minority childhood in a mixed religion family in Islamic Turkey gives her personal insight into the business of leading a double life. Her involvement in the gender community began back in 1973 in the Cambridge, Massachusetts. In addition to extensive credentials in gender and sexual issues she also has training in couples work.

In terms of selecting a therapist, Ms. Crane believes that gender issues are an uninvited dilemma faced by otherwise healthy people. Therefor the professional stricture of not befriending patients can be inappropriate. Ms. Crane's practice, The Gender Dysphoria Program of Central Ohio, is located in the Columbus area.

Antone Feo, Ph.D., and Diane Mueller, L.P.C.C.

Antone Feo & Associates, Inc.

24500 Center Ridge Road Building 4 * #100

Westlake, Ohio 44145

Phone 440-899-1300

Fax 440-899-0266

Email:afeo@afeophd.com

http://www.afeophd.com/

Brooke H. Kroto, L.I.S.W.

Creative SOUL ultions Counseling

21851 Center Ridge Road, Suite 411

Rocky River, OH 44116

(440) 356-9385

Email: CreaSoul@aol.com

Merâl G. Crane, M.A. L.P.C.C.

Gender Dysphoria Program of Central Ohio

P.O. Box 82008

Columbus, OH 43202

Phone: (614) 451-0111

Email: crane@genderprogram.com

Web Site: http://www.genderprogram.com

Thanks To Roger And Karen Lateiner

Many thanks from TransFamily of Cleveland to the Lateiner Family and the Jenni Fund for their generous contribution that was received this past week.

The check, meant to reimburse support and education expenses, will allow us to continue the advocacy and education programs we provide through our website, newsletters, conferences, and programs. The funds will help us support and educate parents, family members, SOs and allies of transpeople. The funds will help us continue to send the "Parent Packs" to parents and others who request support and information.

The Jenni Fund was created to honor Jenni Lateiner, Karen and Roger's trans daughter, who died in an automobile accident in California. Jenni's sister, Bogi, who was a student at Oberlin College, graduated last spring. Along with many classmates, Bogi was a frequent visitor at our TransFamily meetings.

Karen and Bob Gross

I'm Finally Taking Who I REALLY Want To The Prom!!

The Pride Center
cordially invites one and all to the first annual

R  A  I  N  B  O  W     P  R  O  M 

at The Oaks Lodge in Chippewa Lake, Ohio
Saturday, March 31st, 2001

The Prom begins at 6:00 pm, seating for dinner is at 6:30 pm sharp. Tickets are $40.00 for individuals and $80.00 for couples. Ticket price includes a DJ, entertainment by the Front Alley Girls, and a choice of entrees: beef choice, chicken choice, or vegetarian choice. Any alcohol is at an extra cost.

Buy your tickets now!!!

Seating is limited!!! Contact The Pride Center at 330-253-2220 and leave your name, number attending, phone number, address, and entree desired. Check or money order should be made payable to The Pride Center and mailed to P.O. Box 22254, Akron, Ohio 44302. Tickets and directions will be mailed upon receipt of payment.

Prom Portraits by Vicki Lantz Photography

Packages range in price from $18.00 to $40.00 Payment by check or cash due when portrait is taken. Portraits will be taken from 5:30 pm until 6:30 pm (there will also be a short period of time available after dinner for those unable to arrive early). Portraits will be mailed upon completion of professional processing (please allow three to four weeks).

GLSEN Holiday Social

A Holiday Social will take the place of GLSEN Cleveland's December meeting. The purposes of the event will be to enjoy good company, good food, and to share some holiday cheer.

The date of the social is Wednesday, December 13, 2000 and the time will be the usual 6:30 p.m. The location will be at the home of Karen and Bob Gross. Please call 216-691-HELP(4357) for directions or email KittenGr@aol.com.

Those attending are asked to bring a dish to share and a gift for the Twinkle Shop at the Templum House. The shop is a place where women and children staying in the shelter can "shop" for holiday gifts.

Traditionally, GLSEN members donate gifts for children. Templum's wish list includes book bags, radio headsets, Nintendo 64 games (old and new), handheld computer games, board games for teens, sporting equipment, and African-American dolls.

If you prefer to buy a woman's gift, wish-list ideas include journals, inspirational materials, slippers, and flannel pajamas and robes in larger sizes. Program Co-Chairs Valerie and Karen will purchase gifts if you prefer to donate cash. If you would like to donate a gift but cannot attend the holiday social, please contact Karen at Kscebbi@aol.com.

Draft Registration Information

For those who need to be concerned about registering for the draft, here are the facts straight from the Selective Service Administration:

Individuals who are born female and have a sex change are not required to register. U.S. citizens or immigrants who are born male and have a sex change are still required to register. In the event of a resumption of the draft, males who have had a sex change can file a claim for an exemption from military service if they receive an order to report for examination or induction.

NY Times - Anne Rice Interview

By Bill Goldstein, NY Times Books Editor

On October 26, I interviewed Anne Rice live on stage at New York's 92nd St. Y, an event co-sponsored by the Y and The New York Times. Anne Rice discusses her new novel, "Merrick," the latest in her Vampire Chronicles, but she also talks about her return to the Catholic Church, why "Memnoch the Devil" is her favorite among her Vampire novels, and why she is, she says, "a gay man trapped in a woman's body." The event was broadcast live on the Web, and Ms. Rice took many questions from the Web audience.

http://www.nytimes.com/books/00/10/29/specials/annerice.html?1027bk

Reasons To Cherish Being Transsexual

By Jennifer Diane Reitz

Because being transsexual is often so hurtful, so filled with sadness and longing, with shame and loss and difficulty, it is easy to come to the conclusion that the whole thing is utterly a curse, perhaps inflicted by arcane and evil ancient gods.

Oh, probably.

But there is an upside too. Most human lives are utterly mundane, devoid of any real uniqueness; the average person somnambulates through an existence devoted to filling the roles expected of them.

But to be a transsexual is a magical, wondrous thing.

Consider. We are given many gifts in compensation for the terrible loss of our childhood as ourselves, and for the pain we endure. We are by some as yet unknown mechanism statistically far more intelligent, as a class, than perhaps any other kind of people. We are almost universally more creative, and we often possess incredible levels of courage and self determination, demonstrated by our very survival, and ultimate attainment of our goal. We are rare as miracles, and in our own way, as magical, or so has been the belief of all ancient cultures on the earth.

We are given awareness that others would never experience, understanding of gender, of the human condition, of society and the roles and hidden rules unquestioned within it. We are given a window into the lives of both sexes, and cannot help but be, to some degree, beyond either. From this we have a rare opportunity: to choose our own life, outside predetermined and unquestioned definition or role. We can do new things, original things, only because our experience is so unique.

We get to be true shape shifters, and experience the sheer wonder of melty-wax flesh and a real rebirth into the world. Our brains and bodies gain benefit from having been bathed in and altered by the hormones of both sexes. We appear to retain our visible youthfulness where others wrinkle, and for years longer. We possess neural advantages from both sexes, such as the language advantages of the feminized brain, and the spatial abilities of the masculinized brain both. We are shocked into waking up, if we allow it, to a life we create for ourselves ... we are not automatically doomed to sleepwalk through life.

After our transformations, after the full-moon lycanthropic miracle that the modern age affords us, we can live lives of success and love, and genuine specialness, if we choose. If we can get past our upbringing, past the programming, the bigotry, the messages of disgust from the culture around us, if we can stand as ourselves in freedom, then our special gifts grant us a heritage of wondrous power.

We have a proud and marvelous history. In ancient days we were magic incarnate. We were Nadle, Winkte, Two-SouIs, Shamans and healers and magical beings to our communities. We possessed the ability to give the blessings of the gods and spirits, and were prized as companions, lovers, and teachers.

We were the prize gift of ancient tribes, entertainers, designers and dreamers. Sometimes we were the-somewhat reluctant-rulers of empires, and the consorts of emperors. We were champions and warriors too, we were feared for our unique gifts turned to inevitable victory.

Know that it is only in recent centuries, with the rise of the single minded, monolithic and monotheistic desert religions, filled with harsh single gods and twisted, narrow morals, that our kind have become reviled, the objects of scorn. Once, we were the kin of the gods.

To be transsexual is not easy, and it is not a birth that could be envied, but neither is it a damnation. It was once considered a rare wonder, if a mixed one; a faery gift that cuts as it blesses.

And in the modem age, of hormones and surgery, we are the first generations of our kind to finally know the joy of complete transformation, of truly gaining our rightful bodies. No other transsexuals in history have been so fortunate.

I say that we are unicorns, rare and wondrous, with still a touch of ancient magic and the kinship of the gods. Though it is agony, beyond the fire we have the opportunity to become alchemic gold.

We have much to add to the world, and to give to ourselves and those who love us.

We have always been, we are still the prize of the tribe, for only the world around us has changed, the desert harshness branding us vile. We are still the same.

Our compensations are real, and our lives are special; we have but to grasp the gifts born of our sufferings.

When I look around me at the mundane lives, there are times I think that maybe I am glad I was born transsexual, for I would never have been what I have become without that curse I cannot help but be grateful for my uniqueness, so I am brought to a strange revelation:

Deep down, I cherish having been born a transsexual.

Be a unicorn with me, and cherish it too.

Restroom Use Sparks Controversy At Denny's

By Jennifer Farrell, St. Petersburg Times

What restrooms gay and transgendered people use creates a problem

SPRING HILL - November 15, 2000 -- Inside the ladies' room, Aleisha King felt like one of the girls. Standing in front of the mirror in a cocktail dress and heels, the blue-eyed redhead checked her hair and makeup and joined in on the after-hours banter among several exotic dancers who had gone to Denny's last month for breakfast after the late shift.

It wasn't until King headed back to the table that the trouble started. "She's pretty for a guy, isn't she?" shouted one of the dancers to a male friend across the dining room.

Then things turned ugly, King said.

First, the man across the room shouted anti-gay slurs at King, 37, who is part way through the sex-change process and lives as a woman. Then, the man walked over, grabbed King's arm, spun her around and demanded to know if she was a man.

King, while hurt and embarrassed, thought the incident was over after restaurant employees called police and the man walked out of the restaurant. She had been a regular at Denny's on weekends for more than a year and had never before had a problem.

Two days later, though, the phone rang at Differences Pub on Kass Circle, where King tends bar and performs as a female impersonator. King said a night manager at Denny's talked first to her boss, then called back and told her that the ladies' room would be off-limits to King and other transgendered people who had frequented the restaurant on weekends after the pub closed at 2 a.m. The manager also suggested that Lynne Greene, who owns Differences, stand guard outside the bathroom door when King and the others went inside. To King, the new rules made no sense. "I can take my makeup off and still look like a woman," she said. "I know no other life."

The problem escalated the following weekend, when a group from Differences went to Denny's after the pub's Oct. 29 Halloween party. This time, police were called when a disturbance erupted between employees and Jamie Benton, 41, a female impersonator and reigning Miss Gay Hernando. Benton, who also performs as a woman at Differences but lives as a man, said employees harassed him even though he took off his makeup and donned jeans and a T-shirt before going in the restaurant, then used the men's restroom when he got there.

"They were telling me that I had come out of the women's restroom, really getting right up in my face," Benton said. "They were extremely rude. They embarrassed me." After a loud scene, in which Benton said a cook yelled at him in front of a packed restaurant, the group of eight walked out of the restaurant, leaving their food on the table. They have not been back.

"Honey, if I went in there in drag and they want me to go to the men's restroom, I have no problem with it. That's fine with me just as long as I can go pee," Benton said last week. "If they had a problem with something, they should come up and say something, not carry on the way they did in front of the whole restaurant. There's a right way to do things and a wrong way to do things."

King and Benton say the incidents prove that they will be harassed no matter what they do. They, along with other patrons of Differences, have organized a boycott of Denny's and are considering a civil rights complaint.

Denny's manager Bill Cushman declined to discuss specifics of the incidents. He confirmed that there had been problems at the restaurant stemming from men dressed as women using the ladies' room. "I believe we have it solved," he said last week. "They've been good guests for over a year . . . We're trying to accommodate them."

But Greene disagrees. Her partner and co-owner of the pub, Elaine Wanker, used to work at Denny's and the couple were at the restaurant during both incidents. Greene is considering joining in a possible claim against Denny's. "They basically want us to go away," she said. "I feel that is discrimination."

Jessica Archer, who is director of the Tampa-based Florida Organization for Gender Equality, said the incidents reflect a national trend of violence toward transgendered people and transsexuals. "The rule is that you use the facility of the gender that you are presenting," she said. "That rule is based on safety."

Archer said transgendered people often face ridicule and violence. On average, she said, more than one transgendered person has been attacked and killed every month in the United States since 1998. "This is a problem that is not just a problem of Spring Hill, but a problem of Florida and the nation," she said. "At some point we have to start putting aside our stereotypes and start appreciating people as human beings. Denny's has treated these people as walking stereotypes."

In the early 1990s, the Denny's chain faced frequent charges it discriminated against African-American customers. In 1994, the chain agreed to pay $54-million to settle two class-action discrimination suits . Three years later, Denny's Spartanburg, S.C.-based parent firm, gave $1.5-million to nine civil rights organizations.

© St. Petersburg Times

TGs Who Were Forced To Divorce

By Phyllis Frye

Two weeks ago, I spoke at the Annual Symposium for the Albany Law Review. It was entitled, "Sexual Orientation: 'Family' and the Political landscape for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender People (LGBT)."

My presentation was entitled, "Same-Sex Marriages Have Existed Legally in the United States for a Long Time Now."

Part of my paper will be devoted to exposing the barbaric anti-family practice, not so long ago in TG history, when legally married and very loving transgendered couples were coerced to divorce by medical professionals as a condition before the transgendered partner was allowed surgery. "To prevent same-sex marriages!" I know that this happened a lot, but I do not have the data to back up the assertion in a professional journal.

Please help me expose this by circulating this to people who will respond. If they do not have e-mail, ask them to reply to me at 5707 Firenza, Houston 77035.

DEADLINE FOR REPLIES, 10 December 2000.

PLEASE, if you were married before your surgery and then coerced into divorce by the doctors, contact me. If you want it to remain CONFIDENTIAL, simply type CONFIDENTIAL on the top line. If I do not see CONFIDENTIAL, I will assume that it is NOT-CONFIDENTIAL. Either way, please send me a few paragraphs that include the following:

1. The date and state and your age when you were married.
2. The date and state and your age when you divorced prior to surgery.
3. Yes, that you and your spouse wanted to remain married. (Even if you OR your spouse did NOT want to remain married, was it obvious that a divorce would be required by the doctors?)
4. Yes, that the doctor coerced the divorce prior to doing surgery.
5. The method, statement and forcefulness of the coercion to divorce.
6. Anything else is helpfully optional, but optional none the less. your name, address, state, zip and phone (OPTIONAL) the doctor (clinic and location) who coerced your divorce (OPTIONAL) anything else, please limit to five paragraphs

Thank you.

GenderPAC's National Conference on Gender

By Joni Christian

To all who are interested in the future of gender: I would like you to consider doing, "Understanding 'trans' in Genderism" for GPAC's 1st National Conference on Gender. Let's get a definition of "Genderism" so that we can show that we are not taken seriously unless we come from one box or the other. This is just as pervasive as sexism and it doesn't take too much to figure that one out. The intolerance and indifference must stop. Help me to help all of us. If you would like to join me, I would like you to consider being panelists for this upcoming event. Please, let me know as early as possible. The deadline is 12-15-00. Thank you for your continued support.

"Understanding the 'trans' in Genderism" inspires the following thoughts-

In these post-politically correct days, attaching the suffix "ism" to anything tends to provoke yawns, irritation or even outright hostility. This list of ism's is long and growing longer. Categorizing the kinds of oppression visited upon individuals and communities and labeling them 'isms' is a fine game among an academic community used to deconstruction, pseudo-marxist analysis and dialectics. But it less than effective in evoking change in public attitudes.

This workshop seeks to construct a new rhetorical, semiotic and activist basis for engaging in discussions which lead to genuine social change. We focus on the issues related to people of variant gender expression, but the content and methodology is of value to all communities and interests. In particular the use of personal narrative is stressed. The expression of personal stories is vital to the healing of individuals and communities and is also a more effective means of reaching hearts, opening minds and rewriting laws than political/social theoretical constructs based on conflict fomenting patriarchal modes of discourse. We also seek to increase awareness of the personal, social and political victories of transgendered people. By doing so we promote role models for the young, heroes and heroines for ourselves and generate a positive public image for our journey.

This is of course my casting about and may have nothing to do with your intent. But maybe it will be helpful. If I were submitting a workshop on my own, I might do one on "Bridging the gap- Healing the issues that divide segments of the gender community"....but something like that should really be done in this context by several leaders of communities...(get Rikki Anne Wilchins and Virginia Prince on the same panel ).

CALL FOR WORKSHOP PROPOSALS
GenderPAC's 1st National Conference on Gender -- May 18-20th

Deadline For Submissions : December 31, 2000
Notification Process Begins On/Around: February 15, 2001

GenderPAC proudly presents its 1st National Conference on Gender -- a 3-day conference devoted to gender politics, policy, and strategy. NCG will be held in downtown Washington, DC at the Washington Court Hotel on May 18-20, 2001, immediately before National Gender Lobby Day on May 20-22. NCG is designed to bring together all the diverse communities and identities who have a stake in gender rights: youth, feminist, gay, transgender, queer, questioning, and straight.

Conference Priorities

• Strengthen the political skills of gender rights advocates and activists
• Make connections across the diverse communities affected by gender civil rights
• Educate on gender policy and political issues such as hate crimes, job discrimination, misogyny, sexual orientation, media fairness, intersex genital mutilation, and GID reform.

Proposal Review

All workshop and panel proposals will be reviewed by the GenderPAC staff. Considerations for selection include:

• Relevance to gender politics, policy, strategy and organizing
• Content and panelists dealing with diverse groups and communities
• Presenter qualifications and experience
• Overall strength of the submission
• Diverse race/gender/class/age representation among panelists and presenters

Primary consideration will be given to presentations and workshops that are issue-based instead of identity-based and appeal across a broad range of attendees.

For instance, a proposed workshop on gender-based hate crimes would be given stronger consideration if it not only addressed crimes like that of Brandon Teena, but also assaults against gay men perceived as "flamboyant," sexual assaults against women, and the harassment of gender queer youth.

Due to the volume of submissions, GPAC reserves the right to reject proposals or to decline to review proposals received after December 31, 2000. You will be notified of the status of your proposal beginning on or about February 15, 2001.

Presenter Responsibilities

To keep conference registration fees at an affordable rate, presenters are asked to their volunteer time and services at NCG. In consideration of your service as a presenter, you will be able to register for the entire conference at a discounted rate of $100 (the lowest conference rate). This discounted rate includes all plenary sessions, workshops, round tables, trainings, screenings and caucuses scheduled beginning Thursday evening May 18 and concluding through Lobby Day, plus two continental breakfasts and two lunches (Friday and Saturday). This discounted registration rate DOES NOT include special conference events or Congressional Gala on Monday, May 21st.

Presenters are responsible for making their own travel arrangements. You may use your own travel agent or the travel agent for the Conference, Diane Boswell at Wilcox World Travel: 800.294.5269 x308.

Presenters are responsible for securing accommodations. GenderPAC will hold its conference at the Washington Court Hotel in downtown Washington, DC. The special conference rate will be extended to conference participants who mention GenderPAC when making reservations. You may reserve a room by calling 202-628-2100.

If you need a roommate, please contact us directly about our RoomShare Program, which will match you with from 1 to 3 roommates to help keep your conference costs low. We can also recommend economy-priced lodging in the nearby area.

Alpha Omega

By Diane Frank

Last Spring (2000) Karen and Robert Gross, principal organizers of TransFamily of Cleveland, gave moving presentation on the origin of their group and their personal experience of raising the child who is now happily their son. The group meets monthly like Alpha Omega does, and I thought that attending a few of their meeting and providing some information about how those meetings work would be a good idea. Little did I know that my four-year-old nephew-in-law would start expressing gender variant preferences and that attending TransFamily meetings would become more than just a reporting assignment. In that regard, I cannot write another word without specifically thanking Bob, Karen, and Tamera for their help in digging up material on pediatric gender identity disorder (GID) to send to my sister-in-law.

TransFamily meetings differ from Alpha Omega meetings in several important ways. First of all, the dinners are pot-luck and there is no fixed meeting fee. Second, although this didn't happen at the meetings I've attended so far, the group tends to break up into smaller discussion groups on various topics, including a circle for first time attendees. Third and most important, this group's mission is to provide support and community not only to transsexuals, and people with gender issues, it is inclusive with regard to sexuality, and provides support for family, partners, and friends as well. TransFamily is affiliated with PFLAG, Parents, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays.

The group meetings are generally larger than ours, and it is no surprise then that 4 therapists were willing to show up for the October Meeting to provide a general discussion of their services, practices, and to answer questions. My notes from this discussion form the basis for a separate article. I would say that in general the discussion topics are weighty. The issues transsexuals face, unavoidable coming out, dealing with family, friends and job, medical care, passing and identification are always of concern. While cross dressers deal with some of these issues (coming out to family, maintaining relationships and passing), our concerns of managing our dressing, and dealing with guilt and shame are of lesser interest in this group's setting.

Dr. Laura show gets afternoon boot

LOS ANGELES - November 8, 2000 (Hollywood Reporter) - The controversial talk show hosted by Dr. Laura Schlessinger is headed for the post-1 a.m. graveyard as of next week on key CBS stations, including the crucial markets of New York, Los Angeles and Chicago. Sources said the low-rated "Dr. Laura" was due to be downgraded from morning and afternoon time slots to the overnight hours as of Monday on the six CBS-owned stations that carry the Paramount Domestic TV talk show. Insiders said Paramount executives were disappointed by the move and vowed to continue to produce the show. CBS and Paramount are corporate siblings under the Viacom banner. The downgrades are certain to deliver a crippling blow to "Dr. Laura" as CBS stations carry the show in six of the nation's top 10 TV markets.

The following corporations deserve your support for their commitments to the GBLT community.

AT&T
American Airlines
American Express
Anheuser Busch
Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream
Coors Beer
Disney Corporation
IBM
Kodak
Levi Strauss
Miller Beer
NAYA Spring Water
Neiman Marcus
Starbucks Coffee
Subaru
Toyota

SSAFE News

SSAFE is looking for an Intern to provide clerical and program support. This is a paid position.

SSAFE and TransFamily

SSAFE Coalition has voted to accept TransFamily as one of the collaborative groups. Our name will now appear on all SSAFE brochures along with GLSEN, PFLAG, and Gay Lesbian Center. We need many of you to volunteer to help with their projects. Please call the center (216-522-1999) and Judy Maruszan, identify yourself as a member of TransFamily, and ask what you can do to help. Their biggest project is the annual fund raiser, which is held in either March or April (at the Cleveland International Film Festival). Let's have many of our members available to help with the project. In the fall, there will be a need for many of our members to speak at area schools. Please let the center know if you will be available.

Trans information is being required more often at some of the SSAFE seminars. It is really important to have a transperson represented at some of these programs. Please help schools better understand how to help trans youth and take part in these programs!

Call The Center for the location and date for the next SSAFE meeting. And, for more information on any of the above events, please contact The Center at 216-522-1999.

Community Calendar

Courtesy of The Center December

December 1 World AIDS Day! December 1 World AIDS Day Gospel Fest 7p-9pm Mt. Zion Fellowship Church 4265 Northfield Rd in Highland Hills. A spirit filled evening of fellowship in gospel music. Free admission. For more info call Lois Jones 216-368-1888.

December 1 World AIDS Day Concert performed by the North Coast Men's Chorus with guest soloist Tina Stump, free 8pm Gartner Auditorium Cleveland Museum of Art 1150 East Blvd. 440-473-8919

December 1 Shabbat Service and Kaddish, in honor of World AIDS Day, conducted by Rabbi Steve Segar 7:45pm College of Jewish Studies, 26500 Shaker Blvd. 216-378-3477.

December 1 NOCI Christmas Wreath Auction, 10pm Rockies Nite Club, 9208 Detroit Ave. 216-961-3115

December 2 Snowflake Ball, held by Girth and Mirth Cleveland, 5pm at The Center 6600 Detroit Ave.

December 2 Women speak Out for Peace and Justice Festival. 10am to 4pm featuring peace and justice books, t-shirts, bake sale, cafe, entertainment and artists' sale. Pilgrim Congregation Church 2592 W. 14th St. in Tremont. Free admission.

December 2 Tret Fure in concert, Lydia's 1348 S. Arlington Rd. in Akron.330-773-3001

December 3 The Center's 25 Anniversary Party! 1-3pm. Help us celebrate with cake and ice cream!

December 3 Holiday Chili Open 5p-10pm at The Tool Shed/Crossover 2901 W. 29th St. All proceeds benefit AIDS Taskforce's F.A.C.T food bank program. Art auction, raffles, live entertainment and much more. Sponsored by Trident Cleveland.

December 3 Benefit Concert for National Catholic AIDS Network and HIV/AIDS Ministry Diocese of Cleveland presents Fabian E. Toledo organist. Music for Reflection, Remembrance and Thanksgiving. 8 pm at The Cathedral of St. John the Evangelist E. 9th and Superior.

December 7 TransFamily Of Cleveland, meeting at our usual location, 6:30 pm

December 10 An Advent Prayer with the Lesbian and Gay Catholic Community, their Parents, Families and Friends. 3pm at the Catholic Center 1031 Superior Ave. Refreshments will follow the prayer service. Free parking in the Cathedral Square Garage at the corner of Rockwell and Superior. (bring your parking stub in with you) For more information call 216-696-6525 ext. 3500

December 11 Insight Dinner

December 13 GLSEN Holiday Social at Karen & Bob's, 6:30 pm

December 15 The Center's Singles Open House 5:30pm 6600 Detroit Ave. For more info call 216-651-5428.

December 16 Northcoast Men's Chorus Holiday Concert Boys in Toyland. 8pm at Waetjen Auditorium East 21st St. and Euclid (CSU) tickets are $12 advance, $15 at door. Advanced tickets can be purchased at Body Language-3291 W. 115th St, High Tide Rock Bottom-1814 Coventry Rd and Angel Falls Coffee-792 W. Market St in Akron.

December 21 Hanukkah

December 25 Christmas

December 31 New Year's Eve

January

January 1 New Year's Day

January 4 TransFamily Of Cleveland, meeting at our usual location, 6:30 pm

January 21 Windsong presents its annual full-length winter concert at Archwood UCC, 2800 Archwood Ave. 4pm.

January 30 Reel Lives film and discussion night. 7pm at The Center 6600 Detroit Ave. sponsored by the Cleveland Psychoanalytic Society and The Center.

February

February 1 TransFamily Of Cleveland, meeting at our usual location, 6:30 pm

The American Boyz 5th Annual True Spirit Conference

The American Boyz, Inc., a national organization for people who were born female but who feel that is not a complete or accurate assessment of who they are (FTMs) and our significant others, friends, families and allies (SOFFAs), will host its 5th annual True Spirit Conference (TSC) in Washington, D.C., February 16-19, 2001.

The conference, co-chaired by Mike Sanders and Tynan Power, will feature interactive workshops and caucuses presented and facilitated by leaders within the trans+/SOFFA community. Workshops and caucuses will range in subject from health and wellness; identities; SOFFA issues; legal, political and activism topics; "out" in the world; relationships; sexuality; spirituality; and much more. Each night will culminate in entertainment and keynote speeches from trans+ people and SOFFAs.

The True Spirit Conference is open to all who wish to attend and covers issues of interest to a broad spectrum of people, including significant others, friends, families and allies (SOFFAs).

Registration for TSC 2001 will be $60 for advance registration before January 1, 2001 and $90 after January 1. Student registration is $45 at all times; work scholarships are also available.

The True Spirit Conference will be held in the Washington Plaza Hotel at 10 Thomas Circle, NW. This central location is convenient to public transportation via the Washington, D.C. subway system and metropolitan bus routes.

For more information about the conference and to obtain a registration form for TSC 2001, visit http://www.amboyz.org/TSC/TSC.html or contact Mike Sanders at hoobieone@aol.com.

To make a hotel reservation, call the Washington Plaza Hotel at (800) 424-1140 or (202) 842-1300; use group #9840 when you make reservations. For travel arrangements, please call Bruce Forchheimer at 703-522-3777 ext.3106, or email him at bruce@rttl.com.

Feeling Creative??

Hey folks, we need some input. This family newsletter is for the whole group. Please share! Turn in articles and ideas as soon as possible so that they may be included in the next newsletter. Also, don’t forget to inform us of the date, time and place of upcoming events.

If you have any ideas, articles, poems, etc. for the next newsletter, please get them to Karen or Cindy at the next meeting, or calling (216) 691-HELP (4357) or e-mail Karen at karen_gross@transfamily.org or Cindy at cindy.scott@transfamily.org

Promoting Awareness

TransFamily of Cleveland was founded to provide support and education for transgender persons, their families, friends and significant others. We hope to form an outreach group to promote awareness of transgender persons and their issues through PFLAG and to bring awareness to our school systems, through their principals and counselors, by offering literature, speakers, consultation and support.

Notice

Organizations, health care providers, gender clinics, etc. If you have a web site or e-mail address and would like to have us put a link to you on our web site, please contact Cindy Scott at cindy.scott@transfamily.org

TransFamily is provided as a service of Pro-Motion Internet Design a division of Pro-Motion Video and Global Graphics Internet Design, . Website design ©® by Rick Cordaro for Global Graphics Internet Design. Original content and design © copyright TransFamily, all rights reserved.